Broken Dreams
by mystik-dawn
Summary: When he dreams, the past, present, and future haunts him. Despite that, he will still do everything to have his wish fullfilled...no matter what.


**Author's Note #1: _I don't own 07 Ghost, including any of the characters mentioned in this fanfic.

* * *

_**It was snowing.

The snowflakes fell from the sky, creating a thin white blanket on the ground. He looked around, noticing the entire scenery was draped in snow.

A gust of wind came, lightly caressing his silver locks. Despite the temperature, he didn't shiver. He suddenly heard light laughter behind him.

He whirled around, but saw nobody there. Despite that, there were footprints in the snow. Narrowing his amethyst eyes, he gripped the hilt of his sword. He suddenly heard some bells tinkling, and he quickly turned around again.

Nobody was standing there. Again, a pair of footprints were etched into the snow, and he called out, "Who's there? Show yourself!"

Silence greeted him, and the wind began to howl. He gripped his hat, grimly staring into the swirling snow. The snowflakes suddenly changed into flowers.

'_Pretty...like snow...'_

When he heard _that_ voice, he stiffened. His eyes widened, and he looked around warily.

'_Why did you change into that face so suddenly?'_

"No...It's not her," he muttered.

'_Despite everything...you're a kind person...kind...'_

He slowly drew his sword, and menacingly said, "This is not a very good joke. I suggest you stop it right now before I kill you."

More laughter was heard, and he swore he felt warm breath tickle the shell of his left ear.

'_I'm Eve, the Chief of Heaven's daughter...who are you?'_

"Shut up!" he yelled, "She's dead, goddamit!"

'_Will you tell me where I can go?'_

He started to run—he didn't care about his pride, power—far away. He didn't care that his boots were getting spoilt, or that he would have to iron his uniform again—he had to get away from _there_, from _that voice_, from _everything._

'_Well, these signs weren't very clear...'_

"Go...away..." he gasped, "I don't care..."

Musical laughter filled the air, and he suddenly stumbled. He held out his hand to stop himself from falling, and knelt in the snow. Suddenly the snow changed in colour from white...to red.

'_You killed my precious daughter!'_

"No..." he whispered, "It wasn't me..."

'_There's clear evidence! You're the god of death too!'_

"NO!" he screamed, covering his ears. He didn't want to hear it anymore, that voice—taunting, making mockery of him. He looked up, and saw different faces all wearing the same expression: _anger_.

'_You don't love her! If you did, then you wouldn't have killed her, would you?' _

The scenery changed from the red snow...he was surrounded by human bones. There were several figures that had surrounded him—the 7 ghosts.

'_Verloren! This madness has to stop now!'_

"I'm not him," he muttered, "That's not my name..."

'_By orders of the Chief of Heaven, we are to forever seal your powers!'_

Blinding light encased his vision, causing him the quickly shut his eyes. He lifted his hand to shield himself, and after a few seconds, he saw _her._

"You..." he muttered.

She stood there, smiling, holding out her hands towards him. He stood up, and started to walk to her...he increased his pace—he was running...but he couldn't reach her.

Her body slowly dissolved into white feathers, and he gasped when he saw Teito Klein floating where she was standing.

His eyes immediately narrowed, and he angrily exclaimed, "You are not her! Where is she?"

Teito Klein merely gave a mocking smile, and his eyes glowed red. He realized that Mikhail had possessed the boy, and Mikhail spoke, '_Why should she come to a lowly criminal like you? You murdered her after all...'_

"Silence!" he yelled, "You are in no position to tell me what to do!"

Mikhail threw back his head and laughed. _'Time is ticking, Verloren...if you don't hurry, then your wish will never be fulfilled,'_ he [Mikhail] remarked.

He drew his sword again, and threatened, "Don't forget Mikhail, you may no longer be with your host, but that doesn't stop me from my own intentions. I will still capture your master, no matter what."

Mikhail looked at him, amused. _'You can't hurt my master, despite anything,'_ he remarked, '_After all...he does share some similar features to her, correct?'_

Before he could do anything, Mikhail had dissolved into the air. He sank to the ground, slowly closing his eyes.

Laughter was all around him, light and dark...images flashed in his mind...

"No," he muttered, "I'm not him...I didn't do it...I'm not him...I didn't do it...I'm not him...I didn't do it..."

Darkness enveloped his vision, and the last thing he heard was an ear-piercing scream.

* * *

Somebody was shaking his shoulders. His eyelids fluttered open, and his vision swam into focus as he saw Lieutenant Major Hyuuga kneeling over him. Behind the shades, he noticed that his blue eyes were filled with confusion and concern. He felt his whole body beaded with sweat, and his breath came out in short gasps. His amethyst eyes widened as he realized that it was all a dream...a nightmare.

"Aya-tan?" Hyuuga softly asked, "Are you okay?"

There was a bout of silence. He yearned to open his mouth and tell his subordinate _everything_, to pour out his pain, to cry on his shoulder.

He remained silent. Hyuuga raised his eyebrows and remarked, "Did you have a nightmare? You were constantly muttering: _I'm not him _and _I didn't do it_ in your sleep—"

He quickly sat up, and climbed out of the bed. He laced up his boots, and strode out of his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. He noticed the hurt and shocked expression on Hyuuga's face, but didn't care.

He had work to do...he had a wish to fulfill. "I will have you back, no matter what," he whispered.

As he sat at his desk, a faint voice echoed,

_"Time is ticking, Verloren..."_

* * *

**Author's Note #2:** Gah, that was an incredibly creepy fanfic to write. I was listening to very sad music, and this popped into my head. I just wondered...what would Ayanami's nightmares be like? Since I happen to be one of those weirdos fascinated with the completely wrong characters, I wanted to explore his personality and past a bit...what is his POV like? Yes, I am aware that the series portrays him as a coldhearted murderer, but still...there has to be a part that marks him as human...just like all of us.

Thank you for reading, and if you do review, would you mind answering some questions:

1) At the end of this fanfic, what did you feel? Sad? Scared? Why?

2) Did Ayanami remain in character? In your own words and thoughts, what is Ayanami portrayed to you as?

3) Am I even doing a proper job at portraying Ayanami? Should I bother writing similar fanfics like this, or explore other characters?


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